Increasing my repertoire

I think one of the most important things you can do as a parent is to provide good and nutritious meals for your kids.  Sadly many people don't do this in this day and age of lazy cooking, call for home delivery.  Home cooking is so much better for so many reasons only one being that it is probably healthier.  I think it is so important that your kids see you COOKING and MAKING the food instead of just buying things made.  What kind of message does that give them?  That cooking isnt for everybody. Not everybody can do it, like farming, and it isn't bad if I dont do it.  Wrong.  Cooking is for everybody and everyone should try to provide home meals.  The caliber of cooking doesnt matter.  Meaning, you dont have to be a gourmet cook or a Jamie Oliver, just cook. Make anything.  The kids seeing you make a creation, that is just about worth the whole value no matter what you make. 

Thinking about it from when I was a kid,  I really admire my mother all the more that she put so many meals on our table when I was growing up.  And even my father had some meals he cooked. His spaghetti is still ingrained in my memory as one of the most wonderful dishes.   Unfortunately whenever we asked him for the recipe he would just say, "oh, I put in a pinch of some thyme (he said it thyme pronouncing the th) some oregano, some pepper, salt and some other spices I forget.  Beef, tomatoes and paste etc etc..." and he never told us, he never could tell us, the exact recipe.  

But the point is, is that I remember him making the spaghetti, not just dumping cans or jars of stuff together, but making it from scratch.  Even if it hadn't been good, seeing him make the spaghetti would have been worth the whole meal.  But it WAS delicious.  He didnt order out. He never did.  

I watch the Big Bang theory TV series and I find it rather disgusting that they only eat order out pretty much.  I think they send a terrible message to viewers. It is a turn for the worse we have made.  That a company like Blue Apron could even be a big thing to exist.  Roll your own, as the saying goes.   

But back to my father and his cooking.  The funny thing is, my father was our caretaker for over half a year when our family followed him on sabbatical to Europe but my Mother couldnt go.  For the life of me I am trying to remember what he cooked every day.  All I remember is his fantastic spaghetti sauce completely home made.  He wasnt a griller and one can not survive on spaghetti alone.  What else did he cook in that year?  I have a journal somewhere so I have to go back and look it up.  But I wish I could remember off the top of my head.  I would ask him today (RIP dad), "Dad?  How did you survive that year without Mom? What did you cook and how did you stay sane with us three kids at home being obnoxious kids?"  Well in fact he developed a severe back problem and had to stay in bed for over two months.  And then the question is, what did WE KIDS cook and how did we survive?  

I have added three more meals to my repertoire in the past couple weeks.  I am rather proud of myself.

First of all, i tried the stuffed potatoe skins, but we dont get the same potatoes here that you can get all over the U.S. I guess the Idaho potatoes are the ones for baking because they have the real thick skin and you can get a good meal from the skin.   Here we just have the thin skin potatoes.  Still there is a recipe for making cuts in the potato and sticking stuff inside the cuts.  I tried that and it worked so so.  It needs more work.  

I have to say it was good with the stuffing. You can put anything you want in the cuts.  Like myself I like spaghetti sauce or sauerkraut.  But I think this recipe needs a couple more tries to be perfected.  

I dont like to copy what my wife does, I like to strike out on my own and make the kids meals from my own background but my wife taught me to make chicken kebabs which are pretty easy and tasty.  Just grind up the chicken breast with some garlic cloves and 120ml of cream.  I need more practice on them though because I thought you only had to bake them 20 minutes but it seemed that that was half time and they need at least 40 minutes like most of my meals do.  And furthermore I messed up the baked potatoes.  I still need more practice on them.  Mine were a bit soft on the outside and still needed cooking on the inside.  I didnt get a picture of them though.

What made me happiest was making the pork fried rice.  Pictured here.  I had been yelled at the night before because it had been my responsibility to make supper, but when it came to it, I hadnt planned ahead and messed up and my wife had to do it.  So the next night I planned in advance.  I got all the ingredients before and thought about how long it would take me and when I should start. The thing is, when I cooked it, nobody came to dinner except my youngest daughter. She didnt want to eat it because she had thought I was going to make bbq pork and didnt like the carrots in the mix.  I was really saddened by this.  Nobody came to my dinner.  I used the recipe from the delish.com website. So thanks to them. Here is their recipe

Pork fried rice is great because you can use anything and make lots of substitutes of nearly anything. Any meats or any vegetables. And this is a better meal than pizza who most people think is healthy but when it comes down to it, it isnt and shouldnt be for young kids except once in a while.  The pork fried rice has rice and vegetables and eggs.  Even meat is optional.  Some people might not like the frying bit, but I suppose you could try baking it too.  Needless to say, it is good.  I just hope my whole family comes to dinner the next time I make it.  It really bummed me out that they didnt come.  The above picture taken by my daughter is my own creation.   

Oh well, I ll make it for myself some evening I am home alone.  The point is to be able to cook good stuff for the family or just yourself.  Whether they come or not is their fault.  I will continue to work on expanding my repertoire.  

Al Dimeola has been a jazz guitarist for nearly 50 years. Most notably playing with Return to Forever in the 70s with Chick Corea.  Fusion jazz.  Then he has a fantastic live album with John McLaughlin and Paco on "one night live in San Francisco" which was pretty hot.  I have his cd and lp of his 2020 disk "Across the Universe" (pictured below) covers of 14 Beatles tunes.  I will buy the LP soon myself.  I have it available at Maximum Underground for a good price 2 lp. And CD.   My favorite tunes on it by the Beatles are Dear Prudence and Golden Slumber medley.  Both well done.  Give it a listen.  You can order it from Maximum Underground too if you like.  Write to me or my facebook site Maximum.underground 

The Biggest new DON'T for kids ?

 

What is the biggest "Dont" we told our kids in the past?  Dont accept rides from strangers. 

I am not sure if that is still true today.  Or maybe it shouldn't be.  Maybe the biggest NEW DON'T should be: DON'T take any pictures or videos on your phone camera of you or friends or siblings in anything but their clothes doing normal things.  (That is a bit long.  We need a short slogan.  Maybe, "Normal pictures only".  I don't know if that would get the idea across).  Anyway, I am sure you know what I am getting at.  

Why I bring this up now is because I had a little incident in January and it sent me reeling and I had to think about it and now I have to write about it.  

As I understood it from hearing both sides of the story, one sister had to send a picture of another member of the family to a school class of hers.  Now while that may sound innocent enough, of course the person sending the picture had to get the ok to send it from the other person.  So she said she had to send it secretly because no one in the family would want her to send a picture of them.  So she took a picture of her younger sister, in a normal setting, and sent it.  She did not ask her sister's permission, and that is where the trouble came in. Note, my daughter did not ask me for a picture.  She said that I wouldnt have let her send it, but I think I would have.  

Normal picture of kids 

So then what happened was the younger sister in retaliation started taking a video of her older sister who was still in bed in her pajamas.  Nothing dangerous, but of course the older sister did not like that and was trying to hide.  

This part was what made me angry and talk directly and strongly to them. I said, "No no no, no videos or pictures of the other person in bed, or in pajamas or anything besides in clothes and only if they are allowed to."  I said, erase that video right now. I dont even want it on your phone.  Get rid of it now.  

That was when she told me that her sister had taken a picture of her and according to her, sent it to some boy already in her class.  I went to the other sister to get the story straight and she told me the story of just needing the picture of a family member for school.  

(You see, it is difficult to even get the truth on the whole situation)

The stories were not accurate and there were misunderstandings, but the end result was I said  that no videos or pictures of the other person on phones or any gadgets in less than regular clothes and even those only with permission.  I said this to both girls and with equal strength no matter who took the video or picture. In the end the one sister deleted the picture and the younger sister deleted the video and she showed me she had deleted it.  

Really, the problem is, even these seemingly harmless pictures can wind up in the wrong hands and ruin a person.  It can be the start of other people making fun of them. Then it can grow to completely demoralizing them in school.  

You may have heard of the big scam recently of the Pornhub pornography portal getting in a lot of trouble because there is said to be a lot of underaged images there and films with people who did not give their consent to the film let alone wanting it on the internet.  The sad thing is to hear how it has ruined people to the point of suicide, for years. Even decades later they still can come across unwanted results from the pictures or the film.  These are not consensual remember.  

The underage part and non consensual really gets me.  This just results in the destruction of the human spirit, the destruction of the person and the utter lack of knowledge of how to escape the consequences. 

That is very sad for me.  Very sad.  And I really dont see how we will come to any positive conclusion on this.  In other words this is going to reoccur and reoccur for many years to come and destroy more people.  

Thus I had to get this across to my daughters NOW and in a strict, I mean business, tone.  Of course they know about this. They know more about electronics and how to use them than I do.  What they do lack has nothing to do with electronics and how they work, but just with how their brains work.  Their brains are of course not yet developed and chaotic and dont have the full reasoning capabilities.  Thus even if they know about this danger, I really dont think they understand who is "out there" that could take advantage of them and hurt them.  They dont understand how it could spread beyond their control. 

I am afraid of the talk I will have to have with them one on one later as they are a bit older about NOT sending "pictures" to their boyfriends, or any friends for that matter.  I am not looking forward to that. Many of the pictures which destroyed girls were just sent to boyfriends who pleaded for a "compromising" picture and the girls trusted the boys, they were their boyfriends after all, they wouldnt hurt them, would they?   But they did, it did, even to suicidal tendencies and extreme hopelessness. Changing schools to no avail.  Sleeping in cars to get away from a hometown.  It saddens me no end as to how their lives were destroyed rather easily.  

That is why I started now with this small flame up and I will have to re enforce the message later.  That is why now, I think the new biggest "DONT" for our kids should be: "DONT send, or even take, "pictures" (or videos) of yourself to ANYBODY".   

Thanks for reading. 

New Years: Off on the wrong foot

If this January 1st

 My wife makes me this lentil loaf at the beginning of the year so I will make money for the rest of the year.  It used to be lentil soup, now it is vegan lentil loaf.  It hasnt helped me one bit.  I am poorer now after all those years of eating lentils.  I am not going to eat any this year just to tempt the fates and flout the superstition.  Anyway I could just as well eat some pork and sauerkraut and that would do the trick too.  

The point being is that you are supposed to start the New Year off right.  The first day is how the rest of the year will be. Right?  Ie if you have a bad first day, then you will have a bad year.  I hate these supersttitions and yet you always grind your teeth and bite your nails if you dont follow them.  Right?  Well, then my year is doomed because I have really started it off badly.   I might as well just go into hybernation for the rest of the year and wake up in 2022 is what I am thinking. 

1.  Pain

Having nothing to do with being a father or anybody in particular, last week I dont know what happened, and I guess you dont care, but I am just saying, I must have pulled a muscle. Or something happened.  I hope it is a muscle because then it can get better. If it is a bone, then I am in trouble.  It is in my neck so the pain is going down my whole back on the left side and even into my arm.  This isnt covid, I dont know what this is.  I tried a hot water bottle but nothing. Making my usual terrible sleep into horrible.  The type where your dreams correspond to the pain in your back. You try to find a position where the muscles are relaxed, but I cant find anything.  This reminds me of a good internet friend who disappeared a year or so ago who had colitis.  He said when he had attacks it was unbearable.  And maybe due to the colitis, maybe not, he would sometimes wake up screaming and or banging the wall.  Wow.  Where ever you are now, Rick B, I am walking just a little bit in your shoes these days.  

So this is making me miserable... and tired.  I sleep ten hours in the bed and still am tired.  And 

Then this the rest of the year

miserable.  Not really the mood for taking on kids.  Even taking a nap in the afternoon after I have only been up for 4 hours.  That is the back drop, the starter of the new year.  Again, hail to all you suffering right now from Covid or other even more unbearable pains or diseases.  I am able to empathize just a little. I sure wish it would go away. It just sucks all your strength and emotions into this pain. 

2.  No respect from my kids at the start. 

Here we go with this discipline thing again.  Look anybody who likes chocolate would sure wish to be able to eat chocolate 24/7 or potato chips, I like them too.  But you have to balance everything in life.  Not too much chocolate or chips. Not too much time on the gadgets playing the video games.  Equal amounts of vegetables and fruits and getting to your homework.  Gosh darned if one hour doing homework equals two hours of watching tv or video games.  Every adult knows this and most kids know this too.  But the shortest road to happiness is the one with no homework.  Yes, even over Christmas vacation there is still some stuff you have to get done and prepare for after vacation.  

Ow the pain!!!!

But when I tried to maintain the balance for my kids over vacation, even allowing for more fun and chocolate and chips every day during the daily movie together, I still got total disrespect on January 2nd.  Laughing and "yeah yeah" which means, right, like I am going to listen to you.  And even whispering by the kids against me.  Derision.  And this wasnt the Rodney Dangerfield "I dont get no respect", this was kid s bullying me.  My own kids.  It is very difficult to fight back, although you feel the temper swelling.  This is the time they recommend parents to take a step back and get out of the room away or listen to some soothing music.  Sit down away from the temper.  

I sat in my lunch chair and stewed.  I should have put on my new Christmas gift CD (pictured below).

The incident at hand was just that my daughter was messing around with her telephone at lunchtime at the eating time.  That time is sacred for me. It was when I was growing up and I want it to be now.  I have said before no gadgets at eating time. And this was the beginning of the year lunch eating together when we should be even more together and talking with each other.  Yet, it was just "yeah year, wait a minute".   And what was she doing which was so important?  Putting down her new spotify playlist on her new smart phone.  That got me.   That totally unnerved me.  Maybe it was a small thing. I guess I made too big a deal out of it.  You think afterwards.  I guess so.  But at the time it ruined me. 

 I just wanted to be alone.  Luckily they were going to their Grandmas for overnight and I WOULD be alone.  To stew in my physical pain and my emotional pain.  And I did. I really felt blue.  It really was not the best way to start the new years.  

The thing is, they recommend eating lentils or fish scales or pomegranates on the new year day in order to be more prosperous for the year to come.  But do they have anything to eat that will give you strength to be a good parent for the rest of the year??  I have never heard of anything. Please let me know if there is such a thing.

I pray the year will get better from this inauspicious beginning. And in fact when they came back from Grandmas on Jan. 3, it WAS better.  But my neck was still killing me.  

Listened to this CD my daughter gave me for Christmas. I was very happy with it. 

(Bob Dylan of course)

School during Covid Pandemic part 2

Now they are saying in some reports that kids ARE NOT doing as badly as they thought they were doing with internet schooling.  I think it was in California that they said it wasnt as bad as they thought.  Although admittedly, now I cant find the article and all I find are many more articles where parents complain or worry about their kids and on line learning.  

That may be true or it may not be, but internet schooling is much more difficult for parents than regular schooling.   Here, let me list some points.  

1.  Food is much more of a financial time strain on the family with internet schooling.  

Usually with regular school, the kids are eating lunch at the school.  We pay something but it is subsidized by the government and is not as expensive.  It is not as expensive as making them a lunch every day at home.  Home cooking, and my wife is a good cook and tries very hard to keep them fed with good home cooking, not just store bought stuff, adds more to the budget that is for sure. 

Also the time.  You have to have a breakfast, a snack, a lunch, a snack and a dinner.  whoo.  So you have to do the shopping for this.  It is much more time.  Me, I dont prepare so well, so I tend to do a shopping before the meal.  But admittedly if I had to do that every day I would go crazy.  My wife says, lets do a big shopping once a week and load up.  Yes this is better, but we havent gotten to doing it this way EVERY week. So we go back to the fly on the run.  Oh darn I have to go to the store and get food. I know this is a first world complaint. For people who have the sickness or live in poorer countries they can not relate to me.  What am I complaining about?  Well, yes, with the covid pandemic you have to do more shopping.  And you have to budget more money for shopping.   

2.  More responsibility on the back of the parents to help the kids.  

I was dumbstruck a couple weeks ago when our younger daughter's teacher started yelling at the kids that their parents were not doing enough to teach the kids!!!!!!  A) Who is supposed to be teaching the kids?  B) Oh my god, I try to stay available to my daughter every day to help her with the classes I can help her with, Math and English. My wife takes the other classes.  We help her every day.  My wife often doesnt go to work, or takes a small holiday to help the kids more.  Where does this teacher get off....

OK, I dont know what all the teachers are doing. I am not watching them the whole school day, but I do know that my younger daughter's day is finished with internet schooling usually by lunchtime, beginning at 8am.  Then what?  What does the teacher do? I dont know.  But we make lunch and then get going with work and studying.  Lets schedule it out: math at so and so and english in the evening.  She will do some homework by herself from 1 to 2, walk the dog and then since the weather was pretty decent and no snow nor was it really cold yet, we went to the park several times to play ping pong on the tables there outside. This was during my lockdown in November.  That was nice "work", I dont deny, but I am not doing my job.  But then again, my kids are my job also.  But what is the teacher doing?  I can say matter of factly that while the kids are home doing school on line, we, the parents have a lot more work with them in the form of school work, fun work and food.   Please teachers, dont make enemies with the parents at this time.  

3.   More discipline.  

Internet schooling is such a pain.  Normal school is easy.  The kids sit in their chairs and they pay attention.  If they dont pay attention then they can get yelled at or chosen to do the next work on the board.  Internet schooling, there is no such thing..  The student can turn off her microphone.  Ok, you dont need it on all the time, only when you are talking or called upon.  But then when it is off you can talk to anyone else and nobody knows.  The teacher doesnt know.  And then you can turn off your camera too and start looking at your phone or playing a video game or generally not pay attention.  I yell at my daughter to pay attention, she yells back saying another student is "at the board" or talking and she doesnt need to have her camera on.  Well, pay attention, I say.  But Daddy, I know this stuff, it is so boring.  Pay attention.  Dont get arrogant.  Still the same problem with technology, you can be doing three different things when you should be just doing one:  paying attention and learning.  In school, in person, that happens.  With technology on line school, it is a lot easier to wander and lose focus.  Thus Dad has to either watch all the time, not possible.  Or Dad has to make spot checks and make sure they are paying attention and yell at them if they are not.  Not my favorite job.  

4.    MORE STRESSS.  (yes, with three "s" es.)

I dont know what they would be thinking if they think they should use more on line teaching in the future with kids.  I, as a parent, decline, disagree, disparage the notion that this would be a good idea.  Banish the thought. Parents, and I have more than just anecdotal evidence, are way more stressed with internet schooling. 

I just answered a survey to this affect from a professor from North Carolina talking about my experience during covid with school for our K - 12 kids.   I am interested to see what she will find out.  I will be watching and let you know, hopefully in January.  

Are our kids REALLY doing better or about the same as last year before the pandemic?  Well even if the kids are not doing so badly, I can tell you that I and my wife are doing worse.  

Covid Lockdown II : Old Hat?

courtesy Radio Prague International Sept 14 2020

 I guess the first lockdown was more difficult because our family was split and my wife and I were taking turns with the kids at the cottage or being in the city. Nor did we know what to expect.  This one may be easier because we are together and we can trade places from day to day and during the day.  If my wife needs me to make dinner the next day, I can plan to be at home for several hours before and shop and cook it.  Otherwise I am going to my office or store every other day and taking care of other things.  I guess a business is like farm animals.  It always needs to be taken care of, everyday, or it will die.   

Same with kids for that matter. 

I am always home by mid to late afternoon and every other day I am with my kids all day.  My wife has home office so she is home most all of the time.  Still she needs to have uninterrupted time and still make sure the kids are getting things done and not on the video games 10 hours a day.  

I can make sure of that.   Once again, hopefully, I am daddy 40%  OR MORE at home.  

Granted, my daughters are older and don't need as much of US to stay alive.  They can just about do it themselves.  I realize there are parents out there with problem kids, and that, well that is another kettle of fish.  

I do remember when my younger daughter was 2.  She needed nearly around the clock supervision.  But even that to some extent was routine and if you did it correctly you could almost find some free time in there to take care of other things, at least in the house.  Not on a second job of course not.  

Now she is 9 and her older sister is nearly a teenager.  The job has transitioned to "making sure" and being there "in case" but not around the clock supervision.  

Getting tough at home better tag my partner

I have to say though, and I have heard this from many other parents, that home schooling is definitely more difficult.  Even "making sure" and "being there" can be difficult if you have a home office job and need to get stuff done.  But again, this is why two parents, like two hands is much better.  It is like tag team wresting.  When one parent goes into the ring the other can sit out and do what they need to do. Then the second parent goes into the ring and the first goes out.  

There are still so many divorces taking place and only one parent taking care of the kid(s) overwhelmingly more than the other parent.  This is a shame.  Not only do I strongly believe that kids need two parents, but really, this is LIFE people. Every higher species is meant to bring up its offspring.  And isnt it great that now fathers can also partake in this necessity of life and be a bigger role in their kids life, and not just a weekend father.  Why I would say in this day and age even Mark Zuckerberg can and should stay at home a day or two in the week and take care of his Max. Give his wife time to do her other things.  Dads, you are really missing out if you don't think so.  

And so, round two is going ok as far as the kids are concerned.  I hope my wife doesn't have a drastically different opinion than I do.  I guess I should ask sometime, though she may have said so at the beginning that she had it under control.  Even when she has to make 5 meals a day for the kids at home (3 meals and two snacks, yes, growing kids).  

I recall the Japanese article in which wives, one in particular was fed up with her husband. He would not help enough around the house even though he was home bound too, and not doing much work.  Why couldnt he do more house work?  The woman posted it on line what she wanted him to do and got a lot of hits.  (not the same article, but a good one)  I keep asking my wife, 'what can I do?'  Can I do something now while you are making dinner?'   I have taken over the food shopping mostly, or much more, and have added more to the pot for shopping.  I have not contributed so much to the meal making, but have offered, but my wife seems to like to do it if she is home and she has the time, though I did cook twice this week of writing. 

And furthermore, dont expect some big thanks from your wife, or your kids.  I mean, this is her normal load that she was doing, its nice that you take some of her work over, but its not like you deserve a metal for it, You have to thank yourself internally and say you are a better person for it and you are doing a good thing, but this should be the new normal. 

I digress some.  Suffice to say that this second wave is a lot more "downtemp" and easy to handle.  Now that my business is closed I have barely any contact with anyone outside my own household.  The only downside I feel so far is I dont feel I am doing as much at home concerning my business as I did last time.  I seem to have let it slide some and dont have as much taste to do business work at home.  I would rather make sure my younger daughter doesnt need me for some help in Math or English. 

Not sure if this is bad or good. Eh, well, whatever.  It is what it is.  

Ray Keith 1999 Classified LP

Been listening to this LP while writing.  From 1999 Ray Keith drum and bass 5 lp 

Covid lockdown Take Two

 IN the Czech Republic the second wave of Covid virus has hit with a vengeance.  So strong in fact that it is the worst in Europe, probably the world as far as deaths per capita.  The hospitals will be overwhelmed very soon, maybe in the middle of  November if things continue the way they are going. 

People are angry with the government, as they seem to be around the world with their own governments, for supposedly "getting it wrong". Read about the Netherlands where the population used to be proud that their government was the most efficient, smoothest perhaps in the world.  Not so anymore.  Meanwhile in the Czech Republic people might say the government had 6 months to plan for a resurgance and ... PLAN.  And what did they do? They took a summer vacation.  As a result, here it is, take two. With a coming tsunami indeed.  

I say, well look at your own glasshouse dad.  What did you do and are you doing a better job now than in April?

Personally, what did I do to prepare for a second wave of corona virus?  Well, we took a trip inside the country and close to home.  In other words, we had a summer vacation.   

Last June, at the end, the kids were at home, my wife had home office and  was at her wits end perhaps and she was very angry with me. I wasnt doing enough.  I wasnt taking care of the kids enough.  She wanted to leave and take the kids with her at least then she wouldnt have to take care of me.  But as summer went on, we worked hard, the kids went to a summer camp, we got the apartment painted and did some other upgrades before we all went on a very nice summer vacation together. We were very happy by the time school started again in September.  Then the second wave came in the middle of October.  

Where are we now?  Well, my business got closed from last Thursday, my extra work of teaching disappeared bit by bit, my kids are at home learning via online and my wife is conducting all business from our kitchen table or bedroom table.  Lockdown again in all aspects.  Also...

My wife exploded at me the other night in anger and said, well, that I wasnt doing enough to help out with time and money.  Kind of what she said last June.  What have I done in the last 4 months?  I, um, took a nice summer vacation.  

The lesson?  The bad situation itself can change and get better, but unless you take care of the problems that arose during the bad situation those problems will happen all again because you did not take care of them.  You will be in the shark tank in "bad situation 2" unless you do something about those circumstantial problems.  I did not do enough to get rid of the reasons that made my wife angry with me during lockdown one.  So that when lockdown 2 came, she exploded at me for the same reasons.   Get it? 

There must be an Aesops fable for this.  

Lost Summer Vacation 2020

 This year I couldn't take my kids to our usual vacation in Northern Michigan for several weeks.  I couldnt take them to visit their Grandma in Florida.  Instead they went to a camp in their home area for three weeks.   I worked.   I really missed our vacation.  I really really missed it.  

1. Problems because of Covid virus.  

Well naturally at this time of writing it is still very dangerous to travel by airplane.  Let alone an overseas flight with changing planes three times and on the plane for eight hours.  I dont even know if these are happening these days.  Flights between the US and Europe:  are they going on?  I heard of several hubs flights from Europe were flying too.  But even these were limited or cancelled because of the worsening situation in the summer in the US.  

Early in the Spring my Mother said, "You cant come to us, it is too dangerous. Dont even think about it.  I thought, by July, we could make it and smiled in my head over her pre caution.  BUT, by the end of May when I had to either cancel the reservation on my rental house or pay the other half.... it WAS worse  and I had to concede that my Mother had been correct and I couldnt and shouldnt go to the US.  Even though northern Michigan was relatively safe with few cases and even fewer deaths, getting there was the problem.  In fact the weekly list of countries which were dangerous and required quarantine were changing all the time that it seemed impossible to book any vacation outside of our own country (see my next post for more on this).  It WAS downright dangerous travelling. Let alone on long plane flights.  Florida at the time was totally off limits.  It was one of the most dangerous states in the US.  Wow.  

When the owner of the rental flat asked if I wanted to come or had to cancel, I wrote back that I had dreaded writing to her and making a decision, but, I had to cancel.  She understood and thought that would be my answer.  She graciously refunded the first half of the payment.  Well... thats that.  

Cancelled

2.  Florida is getting out of hand at any rate.  The summers are so hot there now.  Every week I was calling my Mother several times and not only did she have to stay inside and not meet people because of the virus, but she had to stay inside because of the heat PERIOD.  The temperature is daily in the 90s and the heat index over 100 all the time.  Ridiculous.  Between 12 noon and 6 pm my Mother can not go outside.  In 2019 we were in Florida in July and we were in danger when we stayed out past 1.30 in the afternoon.  A trip to Jungle Gardens Sarasota got us dangerously hot by 1.30 pm that we had to leave. I thought we could make it till 2pm, but we couldnt. As a result, I  dont see how a trip to Florida in the summer is even possible for us, unless we just stay inside during the whole afternoon.  Kind of silly.  (At this writing it is the beginning of September and the heat in Florida is still daunting).  

So... how will we make that trip in the summer in the future covid virus or not?  

What instead happened was that my daughters went to a camp for three weeks and I worked.  Continuously, six days a week all July.  I dont usually do that.  But a) no vacation was happening and b) I couldnt afford not to work or take any days off.  Every day I didnt work cost more than what I had.  There is less business, naturally, because of the virus.  And since my business relies heavily on tourists, which there are fewer of, I have a great cut in revenue.  Ergo, therefore, etc... Work, by me. 

It was easy to work. I dont mind that, what I did mind was missing my daughters and our usual time together.  I dont want to use this cliche, but I will: I love the bonding we have.  We all love our Northern Michigan vacation, although they dont have other friends there so when they get antsy they fight with each other, but overall we have a great time together.  And last year I proved  that I could handle it all by myself.  I spent every summer there growing up, now I wish they can carry on the tradition in their hearts and minds and so far they are.  But this year we missed it and to compare it, it is worse than hitting a big bump in the road and the car bangs up and down and you feel that something broke from the lurch and the bump.  Something is missing, something broke, maybe a flat tire?  

That was the worst.  But on top of that, I just plain missed my kids in the summer.  Most of the year my wife takes charge of the trips and more than half the time I go, but even so, I have a feeling that they bond more with my wife.  ie winter ski trips. I cant ski, so I cant go with them down the hill. In  the summer it is just us three.  Swimming and going to movies and to the fast food eatery traditions, and, just me with them.  

This last summer they werent even at home in the July month.  And who knows how long they  will want to make the long trip to Michigan and miss their friends in the summer or their dog or whomever? Till they are teenagers??  Hopefully at least that long.  And when one stops will the other daughter want to go with me alone?  

Lost time.  A lost summer.  I missed it. I missed them.  Gosh darned covid virus.  

Ok, I m sounding bloody overly emotional now.  Let s stop it.  

(Next post, the summer vacation which DID happen)

Maybe being re released. I will get this soon.  A classic discordant LP from the discordants epitome. Back from 1982 after Pere Ubu came back together again.  I think they cut themselves loose from their punk roots and just did what they wanted to do.  Happiness rolled together with sadness. Discordance and melody.  Well, at least I think so.  Fitting for the time. I guess.  With the hit "we have the technology"