Summertime 2024 2: Simple joys and happiness in traditions

As you can see from the date that I wrote this, it is right after the Democratic National Convention which just took place last week.  I was terribly interested in the proceedings and watched a lot and tried to read up on Ms. Harris some.  Among all the good things being said there was a little disappointment when I read that her father and mother were getting a divorce when the kids were in elementary school and even though the father even desperately wanted to bring the kids up himself, it being the early 1970s the mother received custody and the father only got visiting rights on weekends for instance.  For sure at the time it would have been unheard of for a FATHER especially a black father to get custody of his kids even though he was the first black economics professor at Stanford University to tenure.   I cant say I know what the circumstances were, so I can not pass judgement, all the same, it is a bit of a shame, although it might have put us in a completely different universe than what we have today.  Maybe. 

However, what I really wanted to say was that he DID have both his kids in the summer and he brought them probably many more times than once back to Jamaica for the summer.  The place isnt important, what is important is that he brought them to the same place (?) every summer and that he was with them.  Both things for sure had to contribute to a better upbringing of his daughters.

A. For one he was an incredibly smart man (of course the mother was also) and would have time in the summer at least to "transfer" some of his wisdom to his daughters, even considering their young age.  B. Even more important, to give them some roots and tradition, a place they could fondly remember all their life (I hope) and a sense of tradition, home and community in the summer. 

 I didnt really intend to write such a lengthy intro to my post, but there it is, for what its worth.  The point is I want to draw parallels to my own summer(s).

Especially this one. 

Not that you are supposed to do anything real deep and meaningful when you are young over the summer, but the very fact of repeating a tradition year after year IS the growth and development which is important. This is stability in the  summertime which includes roots, traditions and a community.  Even if  you can recall when you are an adult, "that I spent every summer in .... and they had the best pizzas which came from ......  We always got those pizzas at least three times over the summer.  Oh, I can still taste them now."  Or, "Yeah, my dad was pretty bad at chinese checkers and I beat him 90 per cent of the time." 

Look, now we come to my usual boring, banal part which I love to write.

Most days I would wake up 8,9ish, read in bed and write in the morning.  My daughter, she still slept late this summer. Even though there wasnt the added incentive of my other daughter there who ALWAYS sleeps late. My younger daughter STILL slept late till 11 or 12. I was happy with this. She was getting 10 hours of sleep which is good for brain development at her age.   

The first question of the day was always, "checkers?".    No matter who asked, the other said of course, "yes".  I think there was only one morning we didnt play chinese checkers.  It was supposed to be a two game wake up, but my daughter would beat me both games and like a gambler, I always wanted another chance to try to beat her. But if it got to be four games and I hadnt won.... no sense, I gave up.  

If we didnt eat a quick lunch or have a home reading day planned we had some outing or errand for the early afternoon.  And some of the errands we had were quite simple.  

In this day and age where entertainment has to be "big" like all day at the carnival rides, or skydiving or ... or, I think it is the most amazing thing that my daughter(s) have always loved our grocery shopping trips in the summer.  The whole process of writing up the list and then we get there and fan out, "ok, I ll get the juices and drinks,"  "Right and I will be at the meat bistro and the vegetables and fruits section." And then we come back to the cart and dump the items and cross them out on the list and look to see what the next item is.  Dinner meats we have to peruse together, prices and what we can make and cook for dinners for three to four days.  And it always took at least 45 minutes.  It wasnt possible to be quick, it was always that amount or an hour.  And when it was all in the cart we each take a guess how much it would cost and who would be the closest in the total amount, kind of like the Price is Right game show.  "What is the worth of the groceries in this shopping cart?"  Folks, you can laugh if you want, you can call me corny, but to find such joy in such a simple, basic job of our western life makes me happy.  I dont need to skydive, or swim in shark infested waters, though I am sure those are fun too, but I can find joy and happiness, and I think my daughters can too, in FOOD SHOPPING.   Go ahead, find the fulfillment in grocery shopping.  Your life will be much better for it.  

Huh, maybe I should have written a full post on that. 

Those were just a couple days. Other than that, we had a dunes day, three knitting class days, a movie day, a couple buying at the shopping mall days, several beach downtown days, two walks in nature preserve days AND several stay home full days reading days.  Also a walk in town and buying books day. 

Whatever it was, most days we were back at the cottage by late afternoon, 5pm or even 6pm for a swim in our lake.    

Especially in that first week in mid July when the temperatures were in the 90s, the lake was very refreshing.  I want to thank my good friend for being there two weeks with his daugther because often the highlight of the day was that swim by the four of us. It entailed tossing the football and diving under the water, seeing how long we could stay under water, floating, underwater hand stands and just talking and messing around.  Actually there were many highlights of the day, because everything in the day was enjoyable, but the pull of the water for me, being in a body of water is psychologically cleansing it seems.  Maybe.  It has some mind cleansing property which adds another dimension of happiness to the whole "thing" of being in the water up to your neck.  

And a late dinner, geez 8 or 9 pm.  Who eats that late? Well, when the sun goes down at 9 to 9.20pm its a perfect time to eat outside on the deck.  

In those hours in the evening we would also find time to sit on the dock on the lake and fish or talk or look at the stars which werent out yet and get eaten by the mosquitoes.  

The thing is, this is probably what we have been doing for 5 years now. It doesnt change that much each year. A couple of new places or trips, some still that we have to take, but year after year, not much different.  But ... I think we all love it that way.  (I hope).  It seems so simple, and it is, but it is so rich, that I thank my lucky stars, and my mother, that I (we?) can find such value in the simple traditions of summer. 

And I hope Kamala Harris during her summers with her father in Jamaica also felt a richness in the tradition of summer after summer.  And it contributed- I think it did but what do I know?- to her well being and her strength.  And maybe, just maybe, it will be a source of strength or at least fond memories for my daughter(s) in her future.  Then I will feel satisfied and happy that I did at least one good thing as a father for my children.  

I hope you had a great time with your children this summer. No matter what you did.  Being with them is the important thing.

Getting this album in next month.  Listened to it during writing.