Now that it is nearly Winter I can stop posting about the summer and talk about current topics. Or maybe this is just a general topic and not really current.
When we were in a Wal Mart mega store my daughter suddenly made me very afraid. She asked me if I would buy her some sort of lipstick or some cosmetic. I dont recall what I said if I had the chance to say anything before she pulled the cosmetic out of her pocket and sort of post threatened me that if I had said no, she would have stolen it.
Wah..... T.F?
Now, a) I dont know if she would have actually stolen it, maybe she would have taken it out at some point, as she in fact did, and put it back or had me buy it, or b) maybe she realized that she could still get caught and didnt want that and was going to produce it anyway and not really steal it.
Still, I got very frightened after that and watched her cautiously in the store especially around the small items things like earrings and those things she likes. I tried to keep a glance on her at all times.
Two things about this which dismay me quite a bit. 1. I have a store myself, am a small retailer, and although I dont think many people do or can steal in my shop, it is a concern that I have to have to watch people and make sure there are no five finger discounts. In fact I am disturbed if anything gets stolen. As happened just like two weeks ago when I realize now that these two guys stole a t shirt. I have to pay for it. Usually the person who makes the least money has to pay for it. Usually the people stealing can afford it, as it happened this time that one guy bought a shirt while the other was stealing. They had money enough.
But I digress. Sadly. 2. Being that it seems that teenagers are a big segment of
the shoplifters. Again sadly I can understand why this is. Of course I do not condone it. Of course not. The problem is, teenagers have to explore and try everything that is dangerous and "against" society and everything that they were told not to do from little kid on. So, drinking, smoking, doing drugs, and shoplifting. Also, they have to impress their peers. The teenager who knows the difference between right and wrong and maintains their integrity in the face of peer pressure.... hats off. Peer pressure is a terrible thing, especially for teenagers. And also, related to the first reason, they do it for the kicks. They dont really need it, they just like the thrill. "Hey, wow, this cost me nothing". Great, but someone had to pay for it. Usually the person making the least money has to pay for it, in a small store, or in a restaurant. If someone runs off without paying for their meal, the waiter/waitress has to pay for it.
I dont think I am going to change anything by writing anything here, so, I am only noting.
But 55 per cent of shoplifters started when they were teenagers and one fourth of shoplifters are teenagers.
The statistic that is bothering is that many shoplifters who start as teenagers continue to be shoplifters into their twenties and dont "grow out of it". And even more loathsome is that these people have trouble finding and keeping a job. In fact they can become petty criminals.
So, if you think your teenager is just going through a phase, remember that NOT ALL teenagers are shoplifters and if you dont do something about it, more than, oh, they will change, then you may be helping your child to in fact NOT grow out of it.
It is always a tough line to follow. Because on the one hand, and I am contradicting myself now, I realize, your child will not be the same person at 25 as they were at 15, they will have concluded a really crazy growth spurt time of their life. On the other hand, bad habits formed early, have to be reversed and re wired in the brain. The sooner they are rewired, the better.
Since the summer I have not been out with my teen age daughter, so I cant really say if she has carried through on one more bad habit. She is going through a period of , to paraphrase Rage against the Machine, "eff you, I wont do what you told me to do" and that could mean that she has tried the five finger discount. I guess I should be a good parent and put it to her again, its just that I think we have gone through some pretty high voltage nagging sessions of "dont do this" "this is not good" that there is only so much nagging that we can dish out and that she can take, that I think for the time, I may not broach the subject. Yes, another contradiction of all I have said, I guess.
And then there are times we parents just have to lay off and hope the kids are doing the right thing.
A rerelease of Plastikman "sheet one" coming out any day now, made me go back to the CD I have of this and listen to it. 30 years old?
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