They say that new parents have it tough. They dont know how to handle being parents and everything is new and kind of scary.. Phffff, big deal. The tiny baby is going "goo goo gaa gaa" and at the most spitting at you or throwing up a bit on you. At the worst you lose a little sleep by the baby crying all night long. Big deal I repeat.
The modern teen ager has the ability to denounce you, dare you (make my day parent, go ahead an hit me), make you so small that you might as well disappear. Its Suicidal tendencies first hit in reverse, in which the child is coming to the parent and saying, "we are worried about you, we think you ought to get yourself committed". And you STILL have to support them. (Did you understand this all?)
Back in the day, my day, we would never have shamed my father. He was a philosopher and intellectual to boot and that just does not work. But maybe we still did, a bit. Maybe some behind his back. I think the only thing we could laugh at was that he didnt know much about modern music nor TV. But big deal, he didnt know who Mary Tyler Moore was or the Six Million Dollar man or Charlies Angels. Not much to shame a parent over.
My cousin started giving me warning signals some years back. He is a bit older than myself and has grown children now. I think he wrote some stories or did some personal jokes about being the but(t) of some of his childrens jokes and being made to be an embarrassing idiot by them. Maybe not that harsh, but basically not wanting to be seen with him because he was embarrassing.
I just still cant quite believe it because in my workplace I see lots of parents who come in with their kids and the parent is in no way ridiculed. The child and parent are either equal, both looking for some music they dont have in their shared collection, or the parent talks about some great band that the kid should know.
So, am I the special case, or the norm?
I listened to hip hop back in the early 90s. But even that doesnt help with my daughter who is hip hop specialist. She doesnt know or care who Chuck D and Public Enemy is/were, let alone Boogie Down Productions, Third Base or De La Soul. Although we can both agree on NWA s Straight outta Compton. But why should I be trashed by her that I didnt know who Tyler the Creator, King Von, or these lame UK garage hip hop acts were? I am willing to learn and listen, but even in that acquiesence, I lose my face against her because somehow I am admitting that I am stupid. Ach du lieber.
generation gap
Several months ago, I wrote a post in which I claim reverse generation gap and I queried over whether it was possible to NOT have a generation gap. And.. I dont think it is. Man, even if you listen to the same style of music, the music of the 90s is 20 years behind her time. She may listen and like one Bob Marley song, but I have heard every Bob Marley song ..... 10543 times and how can I explain that I dont want to hear any "no women no cry" anymore.
It just doesnt work. But it must, I have seen examples of where it has. Or is it in fact none of these kids want to be seen within 10 yards of their parents (dad) in their home town, but in another visiting town it is ok? Maybe.
A week or so ago, my daughter said, " Dad, I am not trying to be mean (that is a scary red flag right there, if you ever hear that from your kids, close your ears and run away), but you ought to buy some of these cook books that mommy has. Get your own. You know these with simple recipes? " Was the most biting "you suck dad" comment I have had to come to grips with. As if i was a complete incompetant and couldnt make myself a salad without burning it. Which just is not true as I have about a ten recipe repertoire now. But boy was it a stinging barb of a comment.
This is what your nice little goo goo gaa gaa babies turn into. So, my new parents when you complain that parenting is scary and the child wakes you up at 2am crying and you dont know what to do... I am telling you, you will have another chicken to roast in 15 years and those problems will cut you down to size to a small peanut. So take the bit of vomit on your nice clean shirt as a sort of trophy and wear it with happiness, because in the future........ oh.... I shudder to think. I am warning you now.
It took me longer to finish this post because I was reading every night till 1.30 or 2am.... Raymond Chandler books
No comments:
Post a Comment